When someone gets a case of acne, the first thing many people say is that one must wash their skin and purge their pores of impurities.
When someone gets a sore that becomes infected, health care providers often want to clean the area, clean out the infection, and begin a regiment of antibiotics to stop the infection from going further.
Cleaning up and cleaning out your home, your car, your closet, your purse/wallet, your locker if you are still in school, and any other thing you can imagine is often the first piece of advice you get when you are trying to solve a problem involving those things. And one often feels better after doing so.
So, what happens when there is a person that makes (or tries to make) you feel bad about yourself? Well, that is another infection that you have to get rid of. And you must do it as soon as you recognize the problem, before the infection spreads. And like with your skin, it can sting and burn as you clean it out, but in the long run, you are better off for it.
I have been in the process for a while of cleaning out some infection of my spirit. Passive-aggressive and aggressive ugliness that there is no need for. I've been called names. I have had things about me twisted around and turned upside down, and then smeared over part of my social circle. Part of said social circle has alerted me to said infection, knowing better or even asking questions, asking my input, my side....others are believing the nonsense and have become, themselves, passive-aggressive. That part of my social circle was actually never really friendly, honestly. But the fact that my name has been spit out like vinegar, both in public and in private is hurtful, eye-opening and, last but not least, hollowing.
But, it's also lending to growth, renewal, healing and repair.
I've discovered weeds in my garden. Some were weeds I was aware of from the get-go, but pretended not to notice. Some were "surprise" weeds, ones I didn't see coming, but weeds that needed to be culled out, nonetheless. Why? Because feeling ugly, feeling less-than, feeling targeted spoils the spirit and embitters the soul. And I won't let the whispers and sneers of the minority rob me of my joy.
Inner joy, peace and happiness are reflected on your outward appearance. It doesn't matter what your waist size, hip size, bra size is, it doesn't matter what color your eyes are, what length your hair is, or the kind of clothes you wear. When you are bitter, people can see it. It seeps from your body and infects those around you. And I don't want any part of that. I hope, dear reader, you don't either.
Using the words of a friend of mine, spread love, not hate. Love is easier to manage. And if there is anyone causing you grief or pain, clean out that infection. Cauterize that wound. Yes, it hurts...but it's better to leave a healed scar than it is to lose a bigger part of yourself.
Until next time,
XOXO
Sam
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